From the beginning of time with EFT, we have always loved metaphors. Here are two more for the collection.
I was wrapping up a block of sessions with a client today and we were preparing her to continue the work on her own. Before finding me she had seen examples online of people tapping on general issues, like abandonment or depression, and bouncing around from one aspect to the next as they came forward.
She noticed that my style didn’t follow that example. Instead of tapping on the general labels we could give to her issues, like she has seen online, I had always chosen specific events, put clear boundaries around them, and managed her focus so it didn’t jump around to other aspects or issues. And we got surprising results in the time we had.
She was wondering if her approach should be more like mine, or like the versions she had seen online.
I asked what issues she would be tempted to tap on and she suggested an “I’m not good enough” feeling that hits her occasionally. I compared an issue like that to a cloud – its boundaries are not fixed and if you start poking at it, it’s likely to break into different parts. Eventually the entire cloud has split into a bunch of smaller clouds, they are spread all across the sky, and it’s really hard to know which one to chase.
With that, she did recognize how that happens in the videos she had seen and she understood how the progress we made in session was the result of keeping the process organized.
She said the cloud comparison sounded a lot like her scattered approach to cleaning the house. Rather than complete one room or one chore at a time, she is more likely to straighten up one room, clean a counter, do a load of laundry, and maybe vacuum a rug. Even if that takes her a couple of hours and she knows she accomplished something, her house still doesn’t feel clean.
I agreed that if we use a scattered approach to address an emotional issue, it would be very difficult to keep track of any progress that was made, or determine what was left to do. Like cleaning the house, she could do a few hours of tapping and assume she got somewhere, but the issues wouldn’t feel much “cleaner.”
It’s better to focus her efforts on one “room” (event) at a time rather than taking on the whole “house” (issue) at once. Then she can see the results of the “rooms” she finished, and be very clear about which one to clean next.
Apply that to your EFT practice and the results will instantly improve.